TITLE

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Fri, 17 May 2013 22:05:48 -0400

me giving my boyfriend a blowjob

Fri, 17 May 2013 19:10:49 -0400

me giving my boyfriend a blowjob

fullcabs: fuck IS THIS TRUE

Thu, 16 May 2013 21:58:39 -0400

fullcabs:

fuck

IS THIS TRUE

mcbrayers: yet another unrealistic expectation for women

Thu, 16 May 2013 21:53:53 -0400

mcbrayers:

yet another unrealistic expectation for women

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Thu, 16 May 2013 21:42:23 -0400

deluminator: debatable

Thu, 16 May 2013 21:41:33 -0400

deluminator:

debatable

kahtiihma: the fuckING PENCIL SHARPENER ONE BRILLIANT THANK...

Thu, 16 May 2013 10:22:32 -0400

kahtiihma:

the fuckING PENCIL SHARPENER ONE

BRILLIANT THANK YOU

deadskeleton: ATTN I DID IT I’VE FOUND THE BEST EBAY STORE

Thu, 16 May 2013 00:17:27 -0400

deadskeleton:

ATTN

I DID IT

I’VE FOUND THE BEST EBAY STORE

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Wed, 15 May 2013 14:05:08 -0400

"I rang the literary editors of a few ‘respected’ papers and asked them how much space they were..."

Wed, 15 May 2013 14:03:06 -0400

“

I rang the literary editors of a few ‘respected’ papers and asked them how much space they were giving to women writers in their ‘review’ sections. Perfectly predictable response. They all said the allocation was fair. One said it was equal, and one prominent editor went so far as to say women are dominating the reviews!

… What happened when I asked who was doing the talking in mixed sex conversations? Well, it was the women of course. And then when you get to measure it you find that women get to talk about 10-20% of the time in conversations with men. A woman who talks about a third of the time is seen to be dominating the talk.

And what happened when I asked teachers who got their attention in class? Well, it was all equal, wasn’t it? No preferences there. And you measure it and find that girls get about 10-20% of the teacher’s attention. Any more, and the boys think it unfair - and go into revolt.

So what do you think I found with the reviews?

I would have predicted about 10-20% of the space went to women’s books. Well, it is less than 6% of the column inches. And the reasonable editor who thinks that women are getting more than their share is one of the worst offenders. Poor boys! It really tells you something when they think only 94% of the review section is not enough, doesn’t it? When 6% for women is too much you get some idea how much men think they are entitled to - as a fair deal.

”

- Dale Spender, correspondence, in Dale and Lynne Spender, Scribbling Sisters (Camden Press, 1986), pp. 31-32 (via radtransfem)

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Wed, 15 May 2013 13:51:47 -0400

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Tue, 14 May 2013 16:46:52 -0400

Noticing when someone is using your triggers to disorient and confuse you

Tue, 14 May 2013 16:45:54 -0400

cumaeansibyl:

realsocialskills:

When someone is using your triggers to disorient and confuse you, it’s confusing. It can take a long time to figure out what’s going on.

Here are some things I think are red flags:

If someone seems to like you more when you’re triggered than when you’re in control, something is seriously wrong

For instance, if a therapist only listens to you when you’re sobbing and otherwise acts as though you couldn’t possibly understand anything about yourself

Or when a friend suddenly finds you fascinating when you’re triggered and they’re supporting you through it, but they half-ignore you most of the rest of the time

If someone feels entitled to discuss triggering subjects with you (absent an immediate practical reason to), something is seriously wrong:

For instance, if you say that you’d rather not discuss dogs right now because it’s triggering and you’re close to the edge already, and they say “but I thought we were friends! How can you shut me out like that?”

Or if a therapist tells you that you’ll never get better unless you are willing to discuss once again, in graphic terms, the ways people abused you - and they refuse to say, help you figure out whether the medication you are taking is working, or whether the side effects are dangerous, unless you do this over and over

If you end up triggered every time you try to reject personal advice, something is seriously wrong:

For instance, if someone regularly wants to tell you how to dress, and every time you try to wear something different, they push you until you end up sobbing and apologizing, something is wrong

This is particularly the case if they’re always bringing triggering things into a conversation that didn’t need to have anything to do with them

Your desire to wear a red hat rather than the blue on they want you to wear is probably because you want to wear a red hat

It’s very unlikely that it’s because you have no perspective on clothes because your abusers damaged you

And even if that was the reason, it would still be ok for you to prefer a red hat, and wrong for someone to try to force you to wear a blue one by triggering you

I have some serious reservations as to the utility of catharsis as a therapeutic tool

like, maybe if you confront your past trauma in a way that leaves you sobbing on the floor that’s a cleansing experience, or maybe it’s just further trauma that doesn’t do anyone any good

your mileage may vary

"And where are the sober spaces? We often talk about “building safer spaces”, and yet our fundraisers..."

Tue, 14 May 2013 16:42:08 -0400

“

And where are the sober spaces? We often talk about “building safer spaces”, and yet our fundraisers are not safe for people that have a current or past history with addiction. They are not safe for people that have experienced abuse because of alcohol/drug dependent partners or family members. And they are definitely not safe for everyone if there is a possibility of police interference. Consent violations also occur more often in non-sober spaces. Don’t we want to ensure the safety of event participants after the event has ended? Including alcohol limits who can attend, what conversations can occur, and who wants to organize. These events usually end with no advancement of our movements, and do not build long lasting, genuine connections.

I am interested in building and sustaining more sober spaces, bridging intergenerational gaps (especially in the queer community), and being accessible to ALL peoples, not just college kids. I am tired of people throwing around the word “community”, when what we really mean is our close group of (amazing and supportive) friends and acquaintances.

”

- An Open Letter to Young Organizers by Yucca (via ok4rj)

"Here is the thing, okay? Coming into a feminist conversation with, “Have you considered that..."

Sun, 12 May 2013 16:28:04 -0400

“

Here is the thing, okay? Coming into a feminist conversation with, “Have you considered that sometimes women acquire free drinks at bars?” is like walking into graduate school during Philosophy finals and saying, “Have you considered that the color blue that I see may not be the color blue that you see?”

Imagine you are the guy who just walked into that Philosophy class and laid that shit down. Imagine the class full of students who have worked very hard and committed themselves and sacrificed to be here, students who have spent several years of their lives learning about this subject. Imagine now their feelings when you go to the head of the classroom with a smirk on your face and demand the professor give you an A for effort. Imagine now that they think you are a douchebag asshole, because they do, and because you are. You are a douchebag asshole because you are obviously so self-centered, arrogant, and completely ignorant of the world around you, that you thought you could walk into a high-level course with no background and no work and say something profoundly simplistic and totally unrelated and also everybody should congratulate you for having done this thing, so brave, so provocative.
[….]
You are not asking us a real question. You are simply illustrating, for all to see, your own ignorance. You are saying, “I have not considered the implications of the question I have just asked. I have not taken the time nor effort nor commitment to sit down and ask myself this question. Instead, I have come into your philosophy classroom/office/feminist blog and shat out my question with a smirk, because I believe that my two seconds of thought are worth more than your long-term analysis, because I believe I am worth more.”

”

- Fugivitus: A few things to consider when you find a feminist blog (via absolutely-spiffing)

jenihead: turtle style 4 lyfe oh thats called dragonfly style?...

Sun, 12 May 2013 15:45:53 -0400

jenihead:

turtle style 4 lyfe

oh thats called dragonfly style? i thought that was missionary. the more u know

jewmingle: confirm3dkill: a Lightning storm crossing paths...

Sun, 12 May 2013 14:48:23 -0400

jewmingle:

confirm3dkill:

a Lightning storm crossing paths with the Icelandic volcano Eyjafjallajökull’s eruption column.

Here’s a link to the National G eographic Article

Thats some war of the gods shit right there.

this must be a weird day for me because this made me so happy i cried??

persisting: martaunderthesea: nightmareloki: candidcaleb: hel...

Sun, 12 May 2013 14:37:44 -0400

persisting:

martaunderthesea:

nightmareloki:

candidcaleb:

hellyeahscarleteen:

Sometimes people have a hard time understanding what a happy relationship between two people who obvs think the other is awesome looks like.

We think this is one great (and holy bananas, so freaking hilarious) example.

omg, so cute. gimme this haha.

I am so giddy, thank you video

New role models for having fun in life! What a wonderful thing to watch.

LOL THE CUTEST COUPLE OMG

holy shit this is basically dudehugs and i irl, karaoke backup and all. holy shit.

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Sun, 12 May 2013 14:22:18 -0400

jetgreguar: tigerhazard: oh my god tag your game of thrones...

Sun, 12 May 2013 13:55:54 -0400

jetgreguar:

tigerhazard:

oh my god

tag your game of thrones spoilers